Writing your own wedding vows

✍️ How to Write Your Own Wedding Vows: A Celebrant’s Guide 

Writing your own wedding vows is one of the most meaningful ways to personalise your ceremony. It’s a chance to speak directly to your partner, share your story, and make promises that reflect your unique bond. Whether you’re a bride, groom, or a friend helping a couple prepare, this guide will help you craft vows that feel authentic, memorable, and deeply personal.

💬 Tip: Chat with your Marriage Celebrant early—they’ll help you shape your ideas and ensure everything flows beautifully on the day.


💖 Why Write Your Own Wedding Vows?

Custom vows allow you to:

  • 🎤 Personalise your ceremony with your own voice

  • 💌 Share intimate promises that reflect your relationship

  • 📸 Create lasting memories for you and your guests

  • 💍 Honour your journey and the future you’re building together


📜 Legal Requirements in Australia

Before you dive into writing, it’s important to know the legal basics. In Australia, each person must say this mandatory vow:

“I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, [Full Name], take you, [Full Name], to be my lawful wedded husband/wife/spouse/partner in marriage’.”

This line must be included—but everything else is yours to shape.


🧠 Preparing to Write Your Vows

Here’s how to get started:

  • Talk with your partner: Decide together on tone, style, and whether you’ll share or surprise each other.

  • Set aside time: Don’t rush—give yourself space to reflect and write from the heart.

  • Keep it concise: Aim for 1–2 minutes of spoken vows.

  • Include what matters: Your love story, promises, shared dreams, and maybe a touch of humour.

  • Be inspired, not copied: Browse examples online, but make sure your words sound like you.


💡 Creative Vow Ideas

Here are three popular approaches couples love:

Approach

Description

Symbolism

Shared Vows

Write and recite the same vows together

Unity and mutual commitment

Individual Vows (Shared in Advance)

Write separately but review together

Balance and harmony

Surprise Vows

Keep them secret until the ceremony

Spontaneity and emotional impact


✨ Tips for Writing Your Wedding Vows

  • Reflect on your journey: What makes your relationship special? Recall milestones, quirks, and shared dreams.

  • Speak from the heart: Authenticity always wins over fancy words.

  • Make promises: Think about what you truly want to vow—support, laughter, adventure, or simply showing up every day.

  • Keep it flowing: Short and sweet keeps guests engaged and emotions high.

  • Practice aloud: Reading your vows out loud helps with pacing and confidence.

 

💬 Final Thoughts from Michael Janz Celebrant

There’s no “perfect” way to write wedding vows—only your way. Whether poetic or playful, your words should reflect your love, your values, and your future together.

As your celebrant, I’m here to help you shape those words into something unforgettable. So take a deep breath, grab a pen, and start writing. This is your love story—let’s tell it beautifully.


💍 Ready to Begin?

Need inspiration, examples, or a sounding board? Let’s chat. I’d be honoured to help you craft vows that feel true to you.

📩 Reach out anytime—your story deserves to be celebrated.

 

Amanda and Sam wrote their own wedding vows with Sydney Celebrant Michael Janz

The format
Deciding how to structure your wedding vows will give you a good jumping-off point. You don’t have to both have to write your own wedding vows in the same format but it does tend to help keep them consistent so that one person isn’t reciting something pages long while the other is done and dusted in two sentences.

[Vow-starter] The first time I saw you, I…

[Promise] I promise to be…

[Promise] I promise we’ll…

[Promise] I promise to love you…

[Vow-starter] You give me…

[Vow-starter] Together, we’ll spend our lives…
Consider giving yourself a word count, say 200 words max. That way, you know you’ll both have vows similar in length.
Whatever the format, if you both do the same, then you’ll be fine.

How Long Should My Vows be?

There’s no right or wrong length to wedding vows. It is suggested through it may be wise to reach an agreed approximate length with your partner. Remember its not a competition, it’s expressing what’s important from your heart.

As a guide most vows take between 45 seconds and around 2 minutes. From a word count perspective 2-minute-long vows would be around 260 words. The 2 example vows below will give a feel for vows that would take just over 2 minutes and just under.  Allen’s vows below are 331 words in length whereas Anna’s vows are 236 words in length.

What could Personal Wedding Vows Look Like
Here is an example of an actual Couple’s Personal Vows that were built from a common agreement on format and number of words. You can see they evolved slightly differently. These like many were kept a secret from their partner.
Allan…
I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, Allan Jeremy Smith, take you, Anna Elizabeth Jones, to be my lawful wedded wife.
Anna, your ten-year free trial period expires today!
Ten years has flown by and I can’t imagine life without you.
You’re my best friend, my biggest supporter and my favourite travel companion. You’ve stood by me during some of the most difficult times in my life and there is no one that I would rather have by my side to take on whatever the future may bring.
Everything that we have is a result of your hard work, determination, resilience and positivity. Everything that I am is a result of your love, support and encouragement.
It struck me when I was writing this that although I know these promises to be true in my heart, I’ve never made them to you in so many words. I want to rectify that now in front of the people we love.
1. I promise to love you. Plain and simple. More than that, I promise to tell you and show you that I love you so that whatever else happens in our lives, you can always be sure of that.
2. I promise to laugh with you and to cry with you. To celebrate the highs and battle through the lows.
3. I promise to support and encourage you. To smile and give you a thumbs up when you catch a good wave and to be the loudest voice in the crowd when you make a try saving tackle.
4. I promise to try not to be so annoying and to want to do what you want me to do without you having to ask!
5. I promise to work on myself so that I can be the best husband that I can be to you and, if we’re blessed with children, the best father to our kids.
I love you, Annie. I always have and I always will.

Anna…
I call upon the persons here present to witness that I Anna Elizabeth Jones take you Allan Jeremy Smith to be my lawful wedded husband.
It was 10 years ago today since we first met and I already knew on that day I felt something special with you, even if I didn’t show it. You are clever and fun and although you have the ability to drive me mad you also give me comfort and care. You fit into my family and they love you as much as I do.
This wasn’t the day we had initially planned but I love you for supporting me through the roller coaster it has been and even ‘volunteering’ to plan this one. No matter where we are in the world I’ll always be at home with you.
The most important part of the day is remembering all the commitments we have already made together over the years and the commitment we are making here today. I have a few promises to start our married lives together.
1. I promise that one day we will travel again and see more new places.
2. I promise to be more patient with your ‘half a job’ behaviours.
3. I promise to support you in the difficult times, stand by your side and work towards our dreams.
4. I promise to be faithful to you.
5. And I promise to love you unconditionally.

Thought-starting questions
When writing your wedding vows, these thought starters will help with filling the gaps. You’ll find yourself coming up with some pretty good stuff that you can include or reference in the vows.
What did you think when you first saw them? Was it love at first sight?
At what moment did you know this person was the one you wanted to marry? Why?
When did you realise you were in love?
What are the little things they do for you that you appreciate?
What are the little things you do for them that they appreciate?
What do you want to work on in your relationship to make it even stronger? Tip: this can be serious – or not.
What do you have now that you didn’t before? Tip: think head and heart, not material things. For example, ‘an appreciation for homemade pasta’ or ‘a newfound open-mindedness and acceptance of people, thanks to our time exploring the world’.
What have they taught you? Tip: be serious and lighthearted too. For example, ‘You’ve taught me to stand up for the things I believe in. And you’ve taught me the many virtues of watching cricket. Actually, no, we’re still working on that’.
Have you gone through adversity together? What did it mean to you to have them by your side?
What inspires you about them?
What do you respect most about them?
What does marriage mean to you?
What are you most looking forward to for your shared future?
What goals and values do you both share? Tip: again, feel free to get playful. For example, you might share a mutual appreciation for a crisp craft beer to kick off a Saturday, or a Wednesday night Netflix-and-chill – but with actual Netflix.
What do you miss most about them when they’re away?
What’s your favourite thing about them?
What’s the most annoying thing that they do?
Where was your first date? How did it go?
What’s the most embarrassing moment you’ve had together?
How about the most romantic moment?
What special quirk do you love about them that no one else would realise?
Have you traveled together? What did that teach you about them?
Did you guys have a rocky start? Why, and what made you guys overcome it?
Do they have a sporting team, band, clothing item or event they’re obsessed with?
What have you experienced together that you never would have on your own?

That’s seriously the hard part done. Now that you’ve fleshed out some of your relationship history, highlight the answers that stand out to you as the most poignant, insightful, heartfelt and fun. You don’t need to do this immediately – return to it in a few days’ time and then review. Your favourite answers will stand out. These are the answers you want to take elements from to weave into your vows.
Next step: agree on a format. The earlier one is a great start. Then, pick some promise starters and vow starters from below, or make up your own and write your own wedding vows.

Promise starters:
I promise to give you…
I promise to treat you…
I promise to tell you…
I promise to love you…
I promise to respect you…
I promise to laugh at…
I promise to be…
I promise to always encourage…
I promise that we’ll…

Vow starters:
I vow to…
I’ll always…
Together, we’ll…
When you’re up, I’ll…
When you’re down, I’ll…
Our future will bring us…
I will never let…
You make me…
You give me…
Because of you, I see the world…
We share…
Life is better infinitely better with you in it because…
I’m proud of…
Your smile makes me…
I admire…
You’ve taught me…
I look forward to…
I’m crazy about…
I value your…
I can’t believe that…
The first time I saw you, I…
I realised I loved you when…

The decision whether you write your own vows is entirely your choice. Your Marriage Celebrant can help with the range of choices you have.

Chrissy and Andrew wrote their own wedding vows with Sydney Celebrant Michael Janz

When to Book Your Wedding Suppliers (Sydney Wedding Planning Guide)

🕒 When to Book Your Wedding Suppliers (Sydney Wedding Planning Guide)

Many engaged couples ask me “When should we book our wedding suppliers?” As a Sydney Marriage Celebrant, I speak with couples every week who feel disappointed when their preferred venue is already booked — sometimes years in advance. With 63% of weddings held on Saturdays, those dates fill quickly.

Book Your Key Wedding Suppliers as Soon as You’re Engaged

The moment you’re engaged, start securing your most important suppliers. Choose your preferred wedding date (or a small range of dates), then book:

These three suppliers shape your entire wedding day, so they should be locked in first.

When to Book the Rest of Your Wedding Suppliers

To make planning easier, I created The Ultimate Wedding Planning Checklist, which you can download for free. It outlines every supplier you may need and the ideal time to book them. I developed this checklist based on feedback from the many couples I’ve married as a full‑time Sydney Marriage Celebrant. Contact me and I’ll send it to you.

If you prefer a digital planning tool, Easy Weddings offers excellent free apps and online checklists. Their directory also features a wide range of wedding professionals.

 

Choose Wedding Suppliers Who Specialise in Weddings

When researching suppliers, look for professionals who focus on weddings. Many suppliers — especially Marriage Celebrants — work part‑time or casually. Only a small percentage of celebrants operate full‑time, and experience makes a noticeable difference in service, communication, and reliability.

Tips for choosing your Marriage Celebrant

  • Look for someone who performs weddings regularly

  • Read their Google and Easy Weddings reviews

  • Watch their ceremony videos

  • Make sure their style matches the atmosphere you want

 

Finding the Right Wedding Venue in Sydney

Searching for a wedding venue in Sydney, NSW? You’ll find an incredible range of ceremony and reception locations. Sydney offers everything from fine‑dining restaurants and luxury hotels to waterfront cafés, function centres, and beautiful parks. It’s one of the most diverse and picturesque wedding cities in Australia.

Choosing Your Wedding Photographer

Most professional photographers showcase their work on their websites, Facebook pages, and Instagram accounts. Sydney’s wedding photography scene is exceptionally diverse — from award‑winning photographers with international recognition to talented artists offering beautiful, budget‑friendly packages. I’d recommend you check out Wedlockers top Sydney Photographers.

 

Vaucluse House wedding We just got married with Vaucluse House Celebrant Michael Janz

8 Stress Free Wedding Tips for a Calm, Enjoyable Sydney Wedding Day

8 Stress Free Wedding Tips for a Calm, Enjoyable Sydney Wedding Day

Your wedding day should feel joyful, relaxed and full of meaning — not rushed or stressful. After officiating hundreds of weddings across Sydney, from the Eastern Suburbs beaches to the Harbour foreshore, I’ve seen exactly what helps couples stay calm and fully present.

These stress free wedding tips will help you enjoy every moment of your Sydney wedding.

1. Stay Hydrated and Nourished

Sydney weddings often involve warm weather, outdoor locations and lots of movement. It’s easy to forget to eat or drink while getting ready, but low blood sugar and dehydration can make you feel faint — especially in summer.

Tip: Have a light meal and keep water nearby. Nominate someone to check in on you.

2. Hair & Makeup: Start Early and Prioritise the Bride

Sydney photographers usually arrive early to capture “getting ready” moments. To avoid rushing:

  • Book your hair and makeup first
  • Have your own transport ready
  • Ask for a small sample of your lipstick or powder for touch‑ups

This ensures you’re photo‑ready when your photographer arrives.

3. Keep Your Flowers Fresh in Sydney’s Climate

Sydney’s weather can be warm and humid, so avoid refrigerating bouquets unless it’s genuinely cool.

  • Keep flowers at room temperature
  • Wrap stems in damp paper towels
  • Avoid sudden temperature changes

This keeps your blooms looking fresh for the ceremony and photos.

4. Groom’s Arrival: Be Early and Ready

Whether your ceremony is at Balmoral, Watsons Bay, Centennial Park or an iconic venue, the groom and attendants should arrive at least 30 minutes before the start time. This allows for greeting guests, settling nerves and photos.

5.

Bride’s Arrival: Aim to Be On Time (Sydney Venues Run Tight Schedules)

The “fashionably late bride” is outdated — especially in Sydney, where venues often host multiple weddings per day.

Arriving late can create stress for:

  • the groom
  • elderly guests
  • families with young children
  • the next couple waiting to use the venue

Arriving on time keeps the day flowing beautifully.

6. Transport: Do a Practice Run to Your Sydney Wedding Venue

Traffic in Sydney can be unpredictable — especially around the Harbour, beaches and CBD.

A few days before the wedding:

  • Drive the route at the same time of day
  • Note the travel time
  • Add 15 minutes for delays
  • Confirm all timings with your hire car or limousine company

Keep $40–$50 on hand in case you need a taxi due to a breakdown.

7. During the Ceremony: Avoid Standing Too Still

Standing completely still — especially in heels — can restrict circulation and cause fainting. To stay steady and comfortable:

  • Gently rock your weight from heel to toe
  • Wiggle your toes occasionally
  • Keep your knees soft, not locked

No one will notice, but your body will thank you.

8. Extra Stress Free Wedding Tips for Sydney Brides & Grooms

For Grooms

  • Buttonholes go on the left lapel, flower facing up
  • Cummerbund pleats face upwards
  • For the best photos, shave 2–3 days before, then again on the morning of the wedding

For Brides

  • Pack an emergency kit (lipstick, tissues, safety pins, needle and thread, band‑aids, pain relief)
  • Bring comfy shoes for after the formal photos
  • Trial your spray tan before the wedding
  • Avoid last‑minute waxing unless you’re sure you won’t react
  • Clean your engagement ring so it sparkles beside your wedding band
  • If you’re wearing a strapless gown, consider removing your bra a few hours before the photographer arrives so your skin has time to settle and any strap marks can fade.

For more helpful wedding planning advice, visit my FAQ page: https://www.michaeljanzcelebrant.com.au/faqs/

Rainforest Retreat Wedding Venue with Brisbane Celebrant Michael Janz

How to Change Your Last Name After Marriage in Australia

How to Change Your Last Name After Marriage in Australia (Simple Guide)

Many newly married couples choose to take their spouse’s family name after the wedding. It’s a long‑standing tradition in Australia, but it is not a legal requirement. You are free to keep your name, change your name, or use a combination—whatever feels right for you.

If you were married in Australia, the process is straightforward. You do not need to apply for a formal Change of Name through Births, Deaths and Marriages (BDM). Instead, your standard marriage certificate becomes your legal evidence of your new married name.

 

The Certificate You Need (and the One You Don’t)

The ceremonial certificate you sign on your wedding day doesn’t fulfil all legal requirements as proof that you are legally married. To update your name with government agencies, banks and other organisations, you must use a standard marriage certificate issued by the BDM office in the State or Territory where you were married.

As your celebrant, I always ask whether you’d like me to request this certificate when I register your marriage. This saves you time and ensures the certificate arrives as quickly as possible.

 

How to Change Your Name After Marriage

Once you receive your standard marriage certificate, you can begin updating your name with:

  • Government departments

  • Banks and financial institutions

  • Superannuation funds

  • Utility providers

  • Insurance companies

  • Phone and internet providers

  • Your employer

  • Memberships and subscriptions

  • Your doctor, dentist and other health services

Each organisation has its own process. You may be asked to:

  • Send a letter or email

  • Complete an online or paper form

  • Visit an office in person

What Proof Will You Need?

Different organisations require different forms of identification. You may be asked for:

  • Your standard marriage certificate

  • A certified copy of your marriage certificate

  • Updated photo ID (e.g., driver licence or passport)

  • A combination of identity documents

Tip: Start with your driver licence and passport first—once these are updated, everything else becomes easier.

 

Where to Get More Information

For the most accurate and up‑to‑date details, visit the Births, Deaths and Marriages office in the State or Territory where you were married.

Wedding Music Ideas for a newly married couple

Wedding Ceremony Music Ideas: A Celebrant’s Guide for Each Moment of Your DayWedding Ceremony Music Ideas: A Celebrant’s Guide for Each Moment of Your Day

Wedding Ceremony Music Ideas: A Celebrant’s Guide for Each Moment of Your Day

Planning a wedding comes with so many exciting decisions — and choosing the right music is one of the most memorable. As a Marriage Celebrant, I’ve found that most couples like to include music at three key moments:

  • Before the ceremony (guest arrival / processional)
  • During the signing of the certificates
  • At the end (your joyful recessional)

I provide recorded music and a professional, copyright‑compliant sound system as part of my service, so you can simply choose the songs you love and enjoy the moment.

Below is a curated list of ideas across different styles — from timeless classics to modern favourites.

🎵 Popular & Modern Love Songs

  • All of Me — John Legend
  • Amazed — Lonestar
  • Annie’s Song — John Denver
  • At Last — Etta James
  • A Thousand Years — Christina Perri
  • Best Part of Me — Busby Marou
  • Better Together — Jack Johnson
  • Can’t Help Falling in Love — Elvis Presley
  • Come Away with Me — Norah Jones
  • Dog Days Are Over — Florence + The Machine
  • Everything — Michael Bublé
  • Everything Is Awesome — Tegan and Sara
  • First Day of My Life — Bright Eyes
  • From This Moment On — Bryan White
  • Happy Together — The Turtles
  • I Found Love (Cindy’s Song) — BeBe & CeCe Winans
  • I Won’t Give Up — Jason Mraz
  • I Swear — All‑4‑One
  • Like I’m Gonna Lose You — Meghan Trainor
  • Let’s Stay Together — Al Green
  • Let’s Stick Together — Bryan Ferry
  • Make You Feel My Love — Adele
  • Marry Me — Train
  • Marry You — Bruno Mars
  • Pachelbel’s Canon in D — Pachelbel String Quartet
  • Run the Red Light — British India
  • Sea of Love — Cat Power
  • Thinking Out Loud — Ed Sheeran
  • Tiny Dancer — Elton John
  • Today — Brad Paisley
  • Tonight, Tonight — Smashing Pumpkins
  • Truly Madly Deeply — Savage Garden
  • When God Made You — NewSong
  • Why I Love You — Major
  • You’ve Got the Love — Florence + The Machine

🎻 Traditional & Classical Wedding Music

Perfect for elegant entrances or signing moments.

  • Allegro Maestoso — Handel
  • Brandenburg Concerto No. 1 — Bach
  • Brandenburg Concerto No. 4 — Bach
  • Coronation March — Sir William Walton
  • Fugue in E‑Flat Major — Bach
  • Hallelujah Chorus — Handel
  • Ode to Joy — Beethoven
  • Spring (The Four Seasons) — Vivaldi
  • Arrival of the Queen of Sheba — Handel
  • Toccata — Widor
  • Tuba Tune in D — Craig Sellar Lang
  • Wedding March — Mendelssohn

🎙️ Oldies But Goodies

Timeless, soulful, and perfect for romantic ceremonies.

  • You’re All I Need to Get By — Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell
  • Signed, Sealed, Delivered (I’m Yours) — Stevie Wonder
  • Do You Believe in Magic — The Lovin’ Spoonful
  • Dancing in the Moonlight — King Harvest
  • Gimme Some Lovin’ — The Spencer Davis Group
  • You Are the Best Thing — Ray LaMontagne
  • Just the Two of Us — Bill Withers
  • The Best Is Yet to Come — Frank Sinatra
  • At Last — Etta James
  • Can’t Take My Eyes Off You — Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons
  • The Way You Look Tonight — Frank Sinatra
  • Let’s Stay Together — Al Green
  • Hallelujah I Love Her So — Ray Charles
  • Baby I Need Your Loving — Four Tops
  • This Magic Moment — The Drifters

🎧 Contemporary Hits for a Modern Ceremony

  • Love Never Felt So Good — Michael Jackson & Justin Timberlake
  • Best Day of My Life — American Authors
  • Home — Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros
  • Dog Days Are Over — Florence + The Machine
  • Strawberry Swing — Coldplay
  • The Way I Am — Ingrid Michaelson
  • Accidentally in Love — Counting Crows
  • Us — Regina Spektor
  • First Day of My Life — Bright Eyes
  • Good Life — OneRepublic
  • Beautiful Day — U2
  • Crazy in Love — Beyoncé & Jay‑Z
  • I Do — Colbie Caillat
  • Happy — Pharrell Williams
  • Halo — Beyoncé

🤠 Country Classics for a Heartfelt Ceremony

  • This Kiss — Faith Hill
  • I Want Crazy — Hunter Hayes
  • Bless the Broken Road — Rascal Flatts
  • Deeper Than the Holler — Randy Travis
  • Cowboy Take Me Away — The Chicks
  • Somebody Like You — Keith Urban
  • Just to See You Smile — Tim McGraw
  • Amazed — Lonestar
  • Ain’t Nothin’ ’Bout You — Brooks & Dunn
  • Sunday Kind of Love — Reba McEntire
  • I Need You — LeAnn Rimes
  • Forever and Ever, Amen — Randy Travis
  • We Danced Anyway — Deana Carter
  • Stuck Like Glue — Sugarland
  • Suds in the Bucket — Sara Evans
Wedding Ceremony Sign with Celebrant Brisbane

Why Wedding Ceremony Readings Can Make Your Ceremony Truly Unforgettable

Why Wedding Ceremony Readings Can Make Your Ceremony Truly Unforgettable

Wedding ceremony readings are one of the simplest and most powerful ways to personalise your ceremony. The right reading can express your values, reflect your personalities, honour your families, or simply add a moment of stillness and beauty to the day.

Readings help tell your story — whether through poetry, modern writing, humour, or heartfelt reflections on love. They bring emotional depth to the ceremony and create shared memories that stay with you long after the wedding.

They’re also a wonderful way to involve family and friends. Inviting someone special to read gives them a meaningful role and adds a personal touch that feels warm and inclusive.

If you’re looking for inspiration, here are some beautiful, heartfelt and adaptable wedding ceremony readings that couples often love.

💛 A Wedding Ceremony Reading That Can Be Tailored to You

Maybe – Author Unknown

Maybe…We are supposed to meet the wrong people before meeting the right one so that, when we finally meet the right person, we will know how to be grateful for that gift

Maybe…it is true that we don’t know what we have got until we lose it, but it is also true that we don’t know what we have been missing until it arrives

Maybe…the happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way

Maybe…the best kind of love is the kind you can sit on a sofa together and never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you’ve ever had

Maybe…you shouldn’t go for looks; they can deceive. Don’t go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile, because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright.

Maybe…you should hope for enough happiness to make you sweet, enough trials to make you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human, and enough hope to make you happy

Maybe… Love is not about finding the perfect person, it’s about learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.’

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